{"id":3341,"date":"2013-10-27T22:44:47","date_gmt":"2013-10-28T02:44:47","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/kerryhannon.com\/?p=3341"},"modified":"2013-11-05T07:01:10","modified_gmt":"2013-11-05T11:01:10","slug":"mika-brzezinskis-mentoring-gesture-left-me-cold","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kerryhannon.com\/?p=3341","title":{"rendered":"Mika Brzezinski’s Mentoring Gesture Left Me Cold"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"forbes\"<\/a>OK, boomer women: When\u2019s the last time you reached out to a younger woman you don\u2019t even know and\u00a0gave her a career boost<\/a>\u00a0without blinking an eye?<\/p>\n

That\u2019s what MSNBC\u2019s\u00a0Morning Joe<\/em>\u00a0cohost Mika Brzezinski recently did, according to an\u00a0article by Peter Sterne<\/a>\u00a0in Capital New York last week.<\/p>\n

Sterne says that Mika (I\u2019ll use her first name because that\u2019s her TV moniker) had just given a talk at the Columbia University School of Journalism when a 24-year-old woman approached her and said she felt a little trapped in her job as a correspondent for Newspath, the national wire service for local affiliates of CBS, Mika\u2019s former network. The young journalist wanted to learn how she could \u201cbreak out and take on a role with more responsibility.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mika\u2019s Kind Gesture<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mika immediately reached for her iPhone and made a call to a CBS exec, arranging a meeting between the reporter and the network honcho.<\/p>\n

Once Mika hung up, Sterne asked her why she\u2019d been willing to go out on a limb for a young woman she had known for only a few seconds. \u201cBecause that\u2019s what women should do for each other, anyone should do for anyone!\u201d she said, laughing. \u201cAnd because I can.\u201d<\/p>\n

(MORE:<\/strong>\u00a0Why Women Need to Be Mentors or Find Them<\/a>)<\/p>\n

My Mixed Emotions About Her Assist<\/strong><\/p>\n

Frankly, I have mixed emotions about Mika\u2019s mentoring move.<\/p>\n

I agree that women should help each other out. But I also think that pulling strings for someone without knowing the quality of her work is not cool. In fact, it\u2019s pretty show-offy and flippant. To me, the call felt almost like \u201cLook how cool and powerful I am.\u201d<\/p>\n

But when I asked some of my female friends for their view, they didn\u2019t necessarily agree with me.<\/p>\n

They were willing to give Mika the benefit of the doubt and applaud her stepping up to help a young woman trying to get ahead in the tough television business. My pals noted that Mika could\u2019ve just said \u201cGood luck, keep at it,\u201d but she went beyond that.<\/p>\n

Too often, my friends told me, they feel that midlife women can\u2019t be bothered to help younger women with their careers. And, they added, the person Mika called had no obligation to hire the woman if she wasn\u2019t qualified.<\/p>\n

4 Ways Women Should Mentor<\/strong><\/p>\n

Mika\u2019s mentoring moment got me thinking about\u00a0how women in their 50s and 60s\u00a0should\u00a0<\/em>assist<\/a>\u00a0younger women professionally, which can be very rewarding for both sides. Here\u2019s my advice:<\/p>\n

1. Make the time.\u00a0<\/strong>As I started to write this blog post, I suddenly remembered that I hadn\u2019t responded to a recent Facebook message from Megan, a young woman who\u2019s a friend\u2019s daughter and graduated from college last year.<\/p>\n

I\u2019d been too busy to write her back, even though we had previously emailed and met for coffee to discuss her hopes of pursuing a career in journalism. I mentally shelved responding to Megan for a later time. Shame on me.<\/p>\n

So as I was working on this post, I stopped writing and sent a message to Megan.<\/p>\n

She quickly got back to me, explaining that she has a job writing obits at a small community newspaper near Pittsburgh. \u201cI will be here a year in February, but I would love to be a travel writer and am trying to figure out how to do that,\u201d she said. \u201cI don\u2019t have the money to travel on my own, so I am trying to find a job that involves traveling.\u201d<\/p>\n

I\u2019ll return her note when I\u2019m finished with this post. See how simple that was?<\/p>\n

I admit my guilt-inspired exchange made me feel good. I was flattered that Megan wrote to me to share her career angst and reach out for help. I\u2019m looking forward to doing just that.<\/p>\n

2. Find a pre-career \u201cmentee.\u201d\u00a0<\/strong>(I\u2019m not wild about that word, but it is what it is). This is the strategy that Charlotte Beyer, founder and CEO of the Institute for Private Investors, uses. The former banking executive likes to mentor young women in college.<\/p>\n

Beyer\u2019s in her fourth year doing just that at Hunter College of the City University of New York, where she mentors one student each year. \u201cI\u2019m continually inspired by these mentees, whom I stay in close touch with, even after our official year of mentoring,\u201d she says.<\/p>\n

Hunter\u2019s management of the mentoring program is a key factor in its success. Mentees and mentors must apply to participate and then attend orientation, midyear check-in meetings and a year-end evaluation reception. \u201cA certain minimum time each month of face-to-face contact is expected and tracked,\u201d Beyer explains.<\/p>\n

Her mentees are first-generation Americans whose families emigrated from India, Ukraine and Siberia. \u201cI feel it is an honor to mentor them,\u201d says Beyer. \u201cNot giving advice so much as exposing them to the business world, helping them network toward a job or internship and sharing stories from the real world.\u201d<\/p>\n

My older sister, Pat, 55, is trying to reach out in a similar way. She applied to be part of a Philadelphia high school mentor program that has a pretty rigorous acceptance process. Pat\u2019s waiting for all the background checks to come back so she can be assigned to a particular student.<\/p>\n

3. Let your mentoring happen organically.\u00a0<\/strong>Kate White, former editor of\u00a0Cosmopolitan\u00a0<\/em>and author of\u00a0I Shouldn\u2019t Be Telling You This: Success Secrets Every Gutsy Girl Should Know<\/a>,\u00a0<\/em>shared her advice with me.<\/p>\n

White says you can sense when young women you\u2019ve worked with or know informally are looking for counseling. \u201cThey are probably eager for mentoring, but don\u2019t know how to say it,\u201d she says, \u201cand you just make that first gesture.\u201d<\/p>\n

If it\u2019s been a while since White last saw the young woman she mentors, she might invite her to come over to her home for a glass of wine to catch up.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s good to keep a certain amount of face-to-face time with women you mentor because that gives them the opportunity to ask questions they might feel uncomfortable about by email,\u201d says White.<\/p>\n

White also sends her mentees emails every once in while to say \u201cHey, how\u2019s it going?\u201d<\/p>\n

And she makes sure the women she mentors don\u2019t feel shy about contacting her. \u201cI give them signals that its OK to touch base if you have an issue you want to run by me,\u201d White says.<\/p>\n

4. Limit the number of women you mentor.<\/strong>\u00a0Sylvia Ann Hewlett<\/a>, an economist and author of\u00a0Forget a Mentor, Find a Sponsor<\/a>,<\/em>\u00a0culls her prot\u00e9g\u00e9es to three. \u201cThese are people I feel have special promise that I invest it in major ways,\u201d Hewlett says.<\/p>\n

She recommends you identify no more than two or three women who you want to groom. \u201cYou need to believe in them and see their value. There\u2019s a certain amount of risk in that,\u201d says Hewlett. \u201cYou\u2019re aligning your reputation. They\u2019re going to be walking around with your brand on them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Once you\u2019ve selected who to mentor, Hewlett says, actively promote their careers.<\/p>\n

If they work for you or with you, \u201chave them in mind when a stretch opportunity comes up,\u201d notes Hewlett. When raises are on the table, recommend that the women receive them.<\/p>\n

And here\u2019s a bonus:\u00a0mentoring this way could boost your career<\/a>. Leaders who sponsor two or three high-performing talents progress faster themselves, according to Hewlett\u2019s studies.<\/p>\n

Where to Find Women You Could Help<\/strong><\/p>\n

Don\u2019t know where to find a woman or two or three to mentor?<\/p>\n

If you have a job, see if your employer has a formal or informal mentoring program. Your high school or college alumni association may offer one, too.<\/p>\n

Also, professional associations such as the\u00a0National Association of Women Business Owners<\/a>\u00a0often match younger members with experienced mentors. Your local Rotary Club and Chamber of Commerce are also good resources.<\/p>\n

Now, if you\u2019ll excuse me, I need to give Megan a quick call and introduce her to someone I know who works in media relations for the Adventure Travel Trade Association.<\/p>\n

Kerry Hannon has spent more than 25 years covering personal finance for Forbes, Money, U.S. News & World Report and USA Today. Her website is\u00a0kerryhannon.com<\/a>. Follow her on Twitter\u00a0@kerryhannon<\/a>.<\/em><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/div>\n
Why You Should Mentor — And How To Do It<\/a><\/div>\n
\"NextNext Avenue<\/strong><\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
Contributor<\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\"\"<\/a><\/div>\n
What It Takes To Become A ‘Woman of Influence’<\/a><\/div>\n
\"KerryKerry Hannon<\/strong><\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
Contributor<\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\"\"<\/a><\/div>\n
The Diana Nyad Swim: 7 Career Lessons For Women<\/a><\/div>\n
\"KerryKerry Hannon<\/strong><\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
Contributor<\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
<\/div>\n
\"\"<\/a><\/div>\n
Women Need To Get Serious About Emergency Savings<\/a><\/div>\n
\"KerryKerry Hannon<\/strong><\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
Contributor<\/a><\/cite><\/div>\n
\"Share<\/a>