At 52, I’ve been grappling with this pay gap issue for years. If you’re a woman in your 50s or 60s with a career, my guess is you have, too.

While the wage disparity makes me mad, it doesn’t make me want to drown my sorrows; I’ve found more effective ways to combat this issue. (I’ll suggest a few shortly.)

April 9 Is Equal Pay Day This Year

I did have to smile, though, upon receiving an invitation to stop by the Hangar Restaurant and Flight Lounge in St. Petersburg, Fla., today for “Unhappy Hour,” held by a group of businesswomen in recognition of Equal Pay Day.

(MORE: Why Women Get Smaller Raises Than Men)

If you hadn’t heard, April 9 is the symbolic day this year when the average woman in the United States will finally have earned the amount, combined with her 2012 pay, equal to last year’s salary of her male counterpart.

Yup, it takes nearly 16 months for women’s wages to catch up, according to The Simple Truth, the recently released wage-gap analysis from the American Association of University Women. This year, incidentally, marks the 50th anniversary of the Equal Pay Act, the law that banned sex-based wage discrimination in the same establishment where men and women perform similar jobs.

There’s not much reason to celebrate, though.

Pay Gap Is Steepest in Your 40s and 50s

The gender pay gap hasn’t budged from 77 cents in a decade, says Catherine Hill, AAUW research director. Worse: Although the pay gap is around 7 percent for workers age 20 to 24, it escalates to 24 percent for full-time workers age 45 to 54, according to the AAUW analysis. That’s exactly the time when you are likely to have reached your earnings peak.

The implications of lagging earnings may be even larger than you realize. Getting paid less than men impacts the amount you’re able to save for retirement and your future Social Security benefits. And those lost earnings can add up to hundreds of thousands of dollars over your working life.

There are a variety of reasons for the pay gap. Many women take time out of the workplace to raise families and care for aging relatives; some choose jobs that aren’t as high-paying as men’s.

(MORE: Get the Perks You Want in a New Career)

Certain workplace experts say women also don’t push as hard as men for raises.

A study in the journal Organization Science called “Engendering Inequity? How Social Accounts Create, Versus Merely Explain, Unfavorable Pay Outcomes for Women,” found that women received smaller raises than men because their managers thought modest pay increases wouldn’t upset women as much as their male colleagues. For more on this, read my post, “Why Women Get Smaller Raises Than Men.”

How Discrimination Still Happens

And despite the Equal Pay Act, there’s discrimination.

Although overt discrimination may be rare today, Hill suspects male and female managers in many workplaces have a subtle sense that women can’t do the work as well as men can. If you believe this atmosphere is rife at your job, please speak up and prove the boss wrong.

3 Ways Women Can Earn More

What else can women do to get paid what they deserve? Here are three ways to close the pay gap at work and bump up your earnings:

1. Become a better negotiator. Most employers have some leeway when it comes to salaries, so developing negotiation skills can help women get paid fairly, Hill says.

Even some high-powered women are skittish about pushing for higher salaries, though.

In her book, Lean In, Sheryl Sandberg says that when Facebook’s founder and chief executive, Mark Zuckerberg, interviewed her for the job of chief operating officer, he made her an offer she thought was fair and she was ready to accept the job. But her husband kept telling her to negotiate for more money.

“I was afraid of doing anything that might botch the deal,” Sandberg writes. “I could play hardball, but then maybe Mark would not want to work with me.”

Finally, her brother-in-law set her straight. He asked her, “Why are you going to make less than any man would make to do the same job?” That ultimately motivated Sandberg to demand more compensation. Zuckerberg improved his offer and she took the job.

Sandberg’s negotiating advice for women: Come across as nice, but insistent. Mary Sue Coleman, president of the University of Michigan, calls it being “relentlessly pleasant,” Sandberg says.

Leadership consultant Selena Rezvani, author of Pushback: How Smart Women Ask — and Stand Up for What They Want, says you shouldn’t take no for an answer.

When you’re in a pay negotiation, Rezvani says, “get comfortable drawing out the conversation or even postponing it rather than nodding your head in agreement or surrendering with ‘OK.’” She encourages women to experiment with being silent for a few seconds to maintain leverage then asking questions that open up dialogue.

2. Prove your worth. If you think you deserve a raise, step up and tell your boss precisely why.

It helps if you’ve just won some sort of recognition or taken on extra responsibilities effectively. The more evidence you can provide, the stronger your case for getting a better raise.

3. Learn your value. When you are applying for a position or are ready to talk with your boss about a raise, tap into your network to find out about typical pay for the job.

This might be easier to do in the public sector than the private sector, though. A survey by the Institute for Women’s Policy Research found that pay secrecy is much more common in the corporate world, where 61 percent of employees are either discouraged or prohibited from discussing wage and salary information. By contrast, only 14 percent of public-sector employees reported that pay discussions were either discouraged or prohibited.

This higher degree of transparency in the public sector may be related to the greater gender pay equity in the federal government, the institute says. Among federal workers, women are paid 89 percent of what men get, the survey says.

(MORE: 5 Tips for Getting a Government Job)

Federal workers or applicants can easily find U.S. government salaries around the country at the website of the U.S. Office of Personnel Management.

To dig up corporate pay information for a job, visit such websites as Payscale.com and Salary.com, as well as the Economic Research Institute site, which can show you what a particular position pays where you live.

If you’ll be interviewing for a top job at a nonprofit, check out the organization’s latest online tax filing (Form 990) to see how much its key employees and executives earn.

When it comes to women’s pay, the more you know, the more you might be able to earn.

 

posted by Kerry Hannon, April 9, 2013 More by this author

Kerry Hannon has spent more than 25 years covering personal finance for Forbes, Money, U.S. News & World Report and USA Today. Her website is kerryhannon.com. Follow her on Twitter @kerryhannon.

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I just read the new book, Love 2.0: How Supreme Emotion Affects Everything We Feel, Think, Do and Become by Barbara L Fredrickson, a pioneer scientist in positive psychology at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, and Fredrickson’s message really resonated with me.

I was especially intrigued by the parts on how positive emotions and love can help your career by “drawing you out of your cocoon of self-absorption to attune to others.”

I often blog about finding ways to love your job. Some of the favorite articles I’ve written for Next Avenue and Forbes have been ones about second-acters who’ve done just that — pursuing their passions to, say, film a feature movie or open a red sauce joint.

(MORE: What to Do When You’ve Lost the Passion for Your Career)

The Falloff in Job Satisfaction

Sadly, though, older employees have experienced the steepest drop in job satisfaction over the past 25 years, according to the Conference Board research group. In 1987, more than 70% of workers 65 or older and nearly 60% of workers 55 through 64 felt good about their jobs; by 2011, their satisfaction numbers had fallen to 46%.

That said, I know plenty of people who’ve found ways to fall in love with their work again, even if they’ve been toiling for decades. They typically either have autonomy and flexibility in their jobs or are learning new things and meeting new people.

But Fredrickson has found that you can also find inner joy in the workplace through simple, practical minute-long exercises. Her bottom line: Find new ways to design your job around love.

I gave Fredrickson a call to find out more. Highlights of our talk:

Let’s start with the key question: What is love? 

Fredrickson: Love is an emotion, a momentary state that arises to infuse your mind and body alike. Love is sharing one or more positive emotions with another person, a reflection that you are invested in each other’s well being.

What do you mean when you say, “Redesign your job around love?”

Fredrickson: Listening and supporting your co-workers can renew your energy, give you confidence and build resources to face tough problems. Feelings of connections and camaraderie spark resilience and a more positive work climate.

(MORE: In a Rut? 4 Ways to Get Unstuck)

Create games at work and find other ways to open up and connect. In our office, we started a weekly card game at lunch. It’s made a huge difference.

Are there ways we can use love to understand our colleagues better and improve our work relationships? 

Fredrickson: Eye contact, it turns out, is crucial. New scientific evidence suggests that if you don’t make direct eye contact with a co-worker, you’re at a distinct disadvantage in trying to figure out what she really feels or means.

Accessing this emotion makes you wiser. You become more accurate, more attuned and less gullible. You intuitively grasp her intentions. It informs your next move.

If you work virtually and can’t see your colleagues face to face, pick up the phone and speak with them. Much emotional information is carried by shared voice, as well.

What’s the root of unhappiness in the workplace?

Fredrickson: All too often the problem is people don’t take the time to truly connect with each other. Feeling pressured to accomplish more each day, you multitask just to stay afloat.

Every moment finds you plotting your next move, what’s next on your never-ending to-do list.

Increasingly, you converse with others through emails, texts, tweets and other ways that don’t require speaking, let alone seeing one another.

Love requires you to be physically and emotionally present. It also requires that you slow down.

Maybe all you need to do is stop by someone’s office to talk about something that’s not work-related.

What are examples of micro-moment exercises we can do to make our work life more joyful? 

Fredrickson: One of the most powerful ones is doing a day review at the end of your workday. Spend a minute thinking about your three longest interactions. Ask yourself how connected, how attuned, how close you feel to the people you were interacting with.

You’ll get a subtle cue reminding you that each of your social interactions is an opportunity for something more than just an exchange of goods or information. When you learn to cultivate these each day, it’s easier to let negativity roll by.

You also think people should reframe what you call their “self-talk.” What do you mean?

Fredrickson: Nearly everyone has some form of inner self-talk. Maybe you worry too much, second-guessing your every move, expecting the worst at every turn.

How many times each day do you saddle yourself with needless negativity?

Self-acceptance is the foundation for positivity. Lightening up on ourselves allows us to get more joy out of what we do.

(MORE: How Women Can Reinvent Their Careers After 50)

Ask yourself: “What is going right for me? What can I be thankful for?”

We can spend all our time focusing on what’s going wrong; problems grab our attention and pull us down that route. But we can also say, “OK, the problems are here, but what’s going well?”

When people ask themselves that, it can be a powerful way to change their inner chatter to let them feel more open, more alive and more likely to connect with others.

You also think employees should try to get joy from the success of their work colleagues. 

Fredrickson: Focus on the good things that are happening to other people. It’s the “it’s five o’clock somewhere” approach. If you don’t have something good going on in your life, celebrate someone else’s good fortune. Recognize it as a source of your joy, rather than resentment. It is not a zero sum game.

Kerry Hannon, Contributor
Kerry Hannon has spent more than 25 years covering personal finance for Forbes, Money, U.S. News & World Report and USA Today. Her website is kerryhannon.com. Follow her on Twitter@kerryhannon.

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2. Will I be working for someone younger than myself?

Employers often sweat that older workers won’t feel comfortable reporting to someone younger, and face it, there’s a good chance you will have a younger boss. This question will immediately give the impression that you’re not up for it, says Elizabeth Craig, a job search strategist at ELCglobal.com. Instead, as you get close to a job offer or at the time of a job offer, ask to meet your potential boss and the team you’ll be working with. “This provides the information you were seeking in a positive way,” she says.

Try to open yourself up to the possibility of working for and coexisting with someone younger, and highlight ways you’ve done so successfully in the past. If you are asked how you would feel about having a younger boss, talk about how it was a good experience. For example, you may have mentored someone younger in effective sales techniques, and were in turn mentored in areas that were new to you.

3. Can you tell me about your company’s benefits?

This is a genuine job-seeker query, but hold your horses. “It’s too early in the process to be talking about this,” says Hannah Morgan, a career strategist at CareerSherpa.net. “Many times the hiring manager doesn’t know how it works, or even has the scope of expertise to communicate it. You’re putting the cart before the horse.”

Of course, you want to know how much the company contributes toward health insurance and how much vacation you will get. “For the average job seeker 50-plus, vacation time, for example, is very important,” says Morgan. They’re at the stage where four weeks of vacation is probably what they’ve had in the past, and thinking about less is a concern, she says. Plus, the employee out-of-pocket cost of health insurance is increasingly a worry as you get older. You also want to know how fast you can get vested in a 401(k) plan and qualify for matching employer contributions.

But don’t ask yet. Instead, Morgan suggests networking with people who currently work there to find out what their experience is. Benefits can vary by department and seniority, but it will give you an idea of what to expect. Save this question for when you are negotiating the offer.

Collamer says you might be able to get benefits information by taking a different approach. “It’s fine to ask open-ended questions, such as ‘Tell me what you enjoy most about working here,’ that might lead to information about the company’s benefits, but keep the initial interview focused on job-related questions and save the questions about benefits for subsequent discussions.”

4. What training will be provided?

A lot of employers want self-starters and don’t want to do a lot of hand-holding with new employees. “My experience is that workers who are 50-plus tend to want a very structured training program. They want to be walked through the process every step of the way,” Morgan says. This can be a real turnoff to some hiring managers. “They think ‘Oh my gosh, we don’t have the resources or time to bring someone up to speed,’ ” Morgan says.

Instead, ask the interviewer how new employees get acclimated and learn the ropes.

5. Can I telecommute? Do you offer any flextime options?

This can be a red flag. Even if you know the company offers this option, don’t ask about it in the initial interview. “This kind of question can make it sound like you’re interested in getting out of the office as much as possible,” says hiring manager Darnell Clarke of the Clarke Group, and author of Employmentology. “Asking about it in the first interview is not appropriate.”

When you’re up front about wanting to work from home so early in the game, it suggests that you’re uber-independent and might not work cheerfully with direct supervision or that you have other demands that could interfere with giving the job your undivided attention.

Moreover, you risk triggering an alarm for the potential employer that you’re not really committed to the job, says Morgan. He or she wants you to be captivated by the opportunity and eager to travel that extra bit and put in the effort necessary to appear in the office every day. Team players are often more appealing than lone rangers, no matter how dedicated and disciplined your work ethic is.

“The question is not so bad, but wait until you have an offer in hand and do your homework to find out if other employees do it and how it works,” she says.

6. How long will it take to get promoted?

This is one of the most common questions that applicants blurt out, and it should be avoided, says Clarke. “It’s inappropriate mostly because it suggests you already have the job.”

It’s good to show you’re eager to get ahead, but you don’t want to dismiss the job in front of you. This question makes it sound like you’re more interested in being promoted or are just biding your time until something better comes along, Collamer says. “A better way to phrase this question is to ask about potential career paths and growth potential, rather than specifically about promotions.”

7. Can I bring my dog to work?

Sure there are pet-friendly workplaces, but it’s probably not worth bringing up unless you see other pooches roaming the hallways.

“Many 50-plus job seekers have a loyal pet that’s their best friend and companion, and they really do bring this up in interviews,” says Craig with a laugh. “Would you ask if you could bring your spouse or best friend to work with you? This falls in the same category.”

by Kerry Hannon, AARP, May 1, 2013

Kerry Hannon, AARP jobs expert, is a career transition expert and an award-winning author. Her latest book is Great Jobs for Everyone 50+: Finding Work That Keeps You Happy and Healthy … and Pays the Bills.

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What’s Next? Making a Difference and a Living
Partners In Care
Wednesday, May 22, 2013 at 6:00 PM (EDT)
Annapolis, MD

Kerry Hannon is a Washington, DC-based career transition, retirement and personal finance expert.  She will talk about making a difference and a living in the second half of life.  She writes the “Second Verse” column for Forbes.com and writes the “Great Jobs” column for AARP’s Jobs Expert. 

Hannon’s latest book is the national bestseller Great Jobs for Everyone 50+: Finding Work That Keeps You Happy and Healthy … And Pays the Bills, ( John Wiley & Sons, September 2012), will be available for signing.

This book has landed on a number of best-of lists, including The Wall Street Journal’s, which named it in 2012 as one of their six best guides for later life.

”Great Jobs for Everyone 50+: Finding Work That Keeps You Happy and Healthy . . . and Pays the Bills by AARP columnist Kerry Hannon is a must read for anyone mulling what kind of work will work for you in the next phase of your life.”

–The Wall Street Journal.

Kerry’s presentation will launch Partners In Care’s initiative to bring the national Coming of Age program to this area.  The program simultaneously builds the capacity of non-profits, schools, and government agencies by teaching strategies for capturing the energy and expertise of older adults.

The  free program is sponsored by Partners In Care Maryland.  Registration is required.

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Much of what makes a great job interview is intuitive. It’s chemistry between two people. When it comes to that point in the interview when you’re asked if you have any questions, you have a final chance to make a lasting impression.

Obvious questions might make it seem like you aren’t that interested. Simple ones make it appear you have not done your research. The key is to have the confidence to ask a few tough but not disrespectful questions. Here are 10 to consider.

See also: 5 jobs in demand for 2013

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On average, 401(k) fees reduce investment returns by 1 to 2 percent a year. As I read in this Next Avenue post, the Demos think tank published a report last year estimating that a median-income, two-earner household will pay nearly $155,000 in 401(k) fees over the course of the two workers’ lifetimes.

Like many of you, I’m on my second act and run my own solo business. I don’t have to sweat 401 (k) fees per se. But I do need to keep a sharp eye on the fees I pay for the investments in my IRA accounts.

Fighting Fees With Index Funds 

One way I trim the fees charged by fund companies on my retirement accounts is to invest in a handful of stock and bond index funds, which carry expense ratios ranging from .05 percent to .16 percent.

Equity fund investors in 2012 paid an  average expense ratio of .77 percent for equity funds that are actively managed by professionals, according to the Investment Company Institute.

Index mutual funds, on the other hand, cost on average, 0.14 percent for equity funds and 0.13 percent for bond funds, according to Bloomberg’s An Investor’s Guide to Fees and Expenses.

Since I don’t have the desire to research and pick and choose specific investments and tweak a lot, I tend to favor low-cost index funds.

But I also fancy the simplicity of target-date retirement funds which increasingly 401 (k) plans are offering, too.

With a target-date retirement fund, you select the year you’d like to retire and buy a mutual fund with that year in its name (like Target 2025, for me). The fund manager then splits up your investment between stocks and bonds, changing that division to a more conservative blend as the target date looms, or soon after.

There are drawbacks to these funds as Roger Wohlner, a savvy financial planner whose advice I respect, writes in his post on what to consider before investing in one. Fact is, they aren’t necessarily cheap.

“In some cases, the overall expense ratio may be a weighted average of the underlying funds. Others may also tack on a management fee to cover the costs of managing the fund,” he writes.

Last year, actively-managed target-date funds had an expense ratio— on average, of .58 percent, according to the Investment Company Institute.

But I merely use these funds as a blueprint model, then add my own with a twist–I build my own target-date retirement fund.

 Setting Up a DIY Target-Date Fund

I set up my own DIY target-date retirement fund in a self-directed IRA at a no-load mutual fund company. Right now, it consists of four stock and bond mutual funds that work like one target-date fund. As I make my regular annual contribution to my retirement savings, I pick which of these funds to add to.

I explained this strategy in a post for Next Avenue, but feel compelled to reveal my approach here for my Second Verse readers who may have been flummoxed about where to invest IRA contributions for 2012 a few weeks back and casting around for 2013 choices.

If this appeals to you, you might research target-date fund families to find a fund with the date that suits your retirement horizon. The major target-date fund families are Fidelity, T. Rowe Price, and Vanguard, though many financial institutions offer them, too.

Locate the target fund on its company’s website and find what percentage of the fund is in stocks, bonds and cash, and which mutual funds the target-date fund invests in.

I chose Vanguard because my husband and I already invest in no-load index funds with the company and the firm focuses on index funds for its target-date funds.

I discovered that Vanguard’s Target Retirement 2025 Fund, for example, invests in three Vanguard index funds, now holding approximately 70 percent of assets in equities through a Total Stock Market Index Fund and a Total International Stock Index. The remaining 30 percent of the Vanguard 2025 fund is invested in bonds.

Within seven years after 2025, the Vanguard fund’s asset allocation gets more conservative. At that point, the fund is expected to hold around 70 percent of assets in bonds and cash, and about 30 percent in U.S. and international stocks. By the way, The Vanguard Target-Date Index Fund 2025 has an expense ratio of .17 percent.

Make it Your Own

In general, I stick to Vanguard’s strategy, but truthfully, I’m  game for a little more risk and potential upside growth, given that I actually don’t think I will tap these funds for two decades. So I  have added a dollop to Vanguard’s emerging markets index fund as well. As a result, my 2025 target fund  is a little heavier in equities than Vanguard’s, but not terribly.

That’s the beauty of my approach. I can tweak the weighting of stocks and bonds in my individual DIY target-date fund to suit my personal risk tolerance level.

I like that feeling of having a little more control of my retirement fund.

Importantly, though, I’m shaving the fees I pay. And that may make all the difference.

Follow me on Twitter, @KerryHannon I’m the author of Great Jobs for Everyone 50+: Finding Work That Keeps You Happy and Healthy … And Pays the Bills (John Wiley & Sons), available here www.kerryhannon.com. Check out my column at AARP. My weekly column  at PBS’s NextAvenue.org is here.

Kerry Hannon

Bill Harris

Kerry Hannon

Kerry Hannon

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Our conversation made me think that this month will be messy for lots of women going through a divorce. Tax season is difficult enough when you have a solid marriage; my husband and I inevitably get into arguments as we roll through how much we spent the previous year.

But divorce can make tax prep particularly angst-ridden.

6 Tax-Saving Tips About Divorce

If you were divorced in 2012 or are going through a divorce now, I’d like to offer six quick tips that will help you avoid paying higher taxes than necessary and potential penalties. (Since the subject of taxes and divorce is tricky, I also recommend you go to the IRS’ website, irs.gov, to get its Publication 504: Divorced or Separated Individuals.)

1. Be sure to select the right federal tax filing status. It’s based on whether you were married or single on the last day of 2012.

If your divorce was finalized by year-end, file your taxes as a single person or, if you had a child and qualify, head of household status; head of household offers more tax advantages than filing as a single person. Otherwise, choose “married filing jointly.”

If you’re not yet divorced, you generally have two options: married filing jointly or married filing separately. Usually it’s better to go with jointly, advises Mark Luscombe, the principal federal tax analyst for the CCH tax advisory firm based in Riverwoods, Ill. “It tends to lower your taxes,” he says.

(MORE: Don’t Let Your Ex Ruin Your Credit)

2. Claim an exemption for your child if you’re allowed. You may be eligible to lower your taxes by taking the dependent exemption for your son or daughter if you were divorced or legally separated last year. To do so, you must have been named the custodial parent in your divorce decree.

If you were the custodial parent in 2012, you may also be eligible for the child care tax credit andeducation tax credits.

In some cases, the custodial parent can give the dependent exemption to the non-custodial parent by filing the awkwardly titled IRS Form 8332: Release/Revocation of Release of Claim to Exemption for Child by Custodial Parent.

3. Don’t run afoul of the tax rules for child support. Neither you nor your ex can deduct child support payments you made. But child support you received isn’t taxed as income, either.

4. Avoid getting tripped up by the tax rules for alimony. If your ex-spouse paid alimony or gave you money each month to maintain your home and life, you’ll probably owe taxes on that income. Your former spouse can deduct the payments. The rules are reversed, of course, if you were the one paying alimony in 2012.

In general, if you were legally separated under a decree of divorce or separate maintenance in 2012 and you and your ex weren’t members of the same household when the alimony payments were made, the rules are the same.

Keep in mind that the IRS is strict regarding what qualifies as alimony and when the person paying it can write off the payments. Cash, checks or money orders meet the alimony test, Luscombe says, but property does not.

(MORE: 5 Ways to File Your Taxes With Less Stress)

Moreover, if you and your husband continued to share a residence after the divorce and he gave you alimony, you’ll owe taxes on those payments and he can’t deduct them.

5. Consider using alimony you received last year to fund a 2012 Individual Retirement Account. You generally need “earned income” to contribute to an IRA — and alimony qualifies. IRA contributions for 2012 can be made until April 15. The Next Avenue article “Last Call to Get Your 2012 IRA Deduction” has the details.

6. Get up to speed on how the recent tax law could affect your 2013 taxes. If you’re in the middle of negotiating a divorce agreement, some of the provisions in the law could “send you over a fiscal cliff of a different kind,” Jeff Landers writes in his recent Forbes.com blog.

Take the time to learn how the law might impact your settlement agreement and negotiate accordingly. It could save you some serious taxes, says Landers, the New York City founder of Bedrock Divorce Advisors, and author of Divorce: Think Financially, Not Emotionally — What Women Need to Know About Securing Their Financial Future Before, During and After Divorce.

For instance, alimony you’ll receive could bump you into one of the law’s new higher tax brackets. If you’ll file as a single person, any income over $400,000 will be taxed at the new 39.6 percent tax rate, up from 35 percent in 2012.

Landers is encouraging his clients to consider an upfront lump sum in lieu of alimony. That way, the money won’t be taxable to you or deductible by your ex.

Landers’ tip reminds me: If you’re going through a divorce and don’t have a financial planner, get one.

(MORE: Women and Financial Advisers: A Rocky Relationship)

Ask friends or relatives for recommendations or go to the “Find An Advisor” Search at the website of the National Association of Financial Advisors. Do an advanced search for a local adviser specializing in women’s financial planning issues and divorce planning.

After all, divorce and taxes can be a headache. Just ask my hairdresser.

Kerry Hannon has spent more than 25 years covering personal finance for Forbes, Money, U.S. News & World Report and USA Today. Her website is kerryhannon.com. Follow her on Twitter @kerryhannon.

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Somewhat surprisingly, most of them weren’t the least bit worried about a market tumble.I knew that I wasn’t nervous either. That’s because I rarely buy individual stocks — “diversify through mutual funds” is my motto — and routinely rebalance my portfolio to ensure its mix of stocks and bonds matches my intention.

But I wasn’t sure my friends had the same sensible mojo.

Joining in the Market Mania

It’s tempting to buy stocks these days, since no one wants to miss out on a bull market. “I find it fascinating that new money is flowing into the market now, instead of in 2009 when stocks were on sale,” says Eileen O’Connor, a wealth manager at McLean Asset Management Corp. in McLean, Va., referring to the market bottom.

Gregory A. Bitz, president of the Metropolitan Financial Group in Chevy Chase, Md., echoes O’Connor. He has noticed small investors going a little bit bonkers lately.

“In the last couple of weeks, I have had more delusional emails from clients about the stock market than I have had for years,” Bitz says. “They’re caught in the bubble of ‘I’m making money and it feels so good I need more.’”

Time to Reassess Your Investments

A bit of advice from Bitz: Put the brakes on.

“Think back to how bad you felt four years ago, when you lost half your money in the market,” he says.

Bitz believes that now is the perfect time to reassess your risk tolerance and perhaps shift some of your portfolio out of stocks and into less volatile investments, like bonds or total stock market index funds, mutual funds that track the total returns of the entire U.S. market.

I agree with him.

How My Friends Are Investing Now

So what are my female friends up to with their investments?

Some have bought shares of companies they’ve been eyeing because they think they’re undervalued. They believe these stocks will be winners over time and are willing to take the risk that the market will stay relatively robust, since corporate earnings and dividends are rising, the housing market has steadied and the unemployment rate is slowly falling.

That’s a solid investment strategy in any market, I say.

Others told me the market’s rise gave them the impetus they needed to up their investment in stocks. One said she just bought shares in a company whose stock was beginning to tick up. “I think this one has legs,” she said.

Frankly, hearing that worried me a little. Some pros say that when normally cautious investors buy stocks because the market is frothy, it can be a sign that the ride is almost over.

One pal took the opposite course, selling two tech stocks that had been dogs for some time, but had finally produced gains. She happily paid taxes on her profits and plans to use the money to finally put in the kitchen counters she has long wanted.A cautious 57-year-old friend has rebalanced her portfolio, shifting her new 401(k) contributions into bonds. This way, her retirement account will again be 65 percent in stocks and 35 percent in bonds. That’s the breakdown she and her adviser felt suited her age and her moderately aggressive risk tolerance.

“It scares me to have too much riding on the stock market,” she told me.

Not only do I applaud her move, I’m pleased to say that our gender is generally good about rebalancing.

“Women are better long-term investors than men,” O’Connor says. “So they are likely better positioned to systematically rebalance regularly and let their goals drive their allocation, not market events.”

Optimistic About Stocks

So what should investors be doing now that the market has hit heady highs?

Overall, I agree with Chris Farrell, who recently wrote on Next Avenue that he believes the economic fundamentals suggest that stocks still have a long way to go. And I second his view that market volatility won’t disappear, so you should “embrace diversification, dollar-cost averaging and a balanced portfolio.”

4 Recommendations From Money Advisers

That brings me to the advice I heard this week in interviews with money pros. Their four recommendations:

1. Keep cool and review your investments. Discipline is critical in an up market, says Roger Wohlner, a fee-only financial planner with Asset Strategy Consultants in Arlington Heights, Ill.

“Invariably, many investors feel overly confident that their investments will continue to rise,” he says. As a result, Wohlner notes, they let the stock portion of their portfolio get overweighted, which makes their savings vulnerable when the market turns south.

Given the market’s run-up, it’s a good time to look over your portfolio, including your 401(k) account, to ensure that your stock and bond allocations aren’t out of whack.

“Generally if a client’s allocation varies by more than 5 percent above or below the target we set, we consider rebalancing,” Wohlner says.

(MORE: And Now a Cheery View of Women and Retirement)

2. Secure profits prudently. Take the rebalancing process a step further and use the market rally as a reason to weed out some of your stocks.

You might sell ones that haven’t performed well, have climbed only slightly or no longer suit your investment tastes, as I wrote in this  Next Avenue post on investing with your conscience.

3. Diversify your holdings. Since U.S. stocks have been on a tear, “we’re encouraging people to look more internationally,” says Christine Fahlund, a senior financial planner at T. Rowe Price in Baltimore.

f your retirement account’s domestic stock funds have soared in value recently, it could be an opportune time to start putting money into an international fund or a global stock fund with U.S. and foreign holdings, she advises.

You might also consider making some new retirement plan contributions into an alternative investment, like a real estate investment trust or a mutual fund that buys them.

4. Donate some stocks or stock funds to charity. Stocks that have soared in value are especially appropriate, Fahlund says. That’s because you won’t owe capital gains when you give them to a charity.

Just be sure to vet any charity before you make such a gift to help ensure the money will be put to good use.

I offered some tips on how to do so in my blog post, “How More Women Can Become Philanthropists.” Ken Stern, author of With Charity for All, also has some smart suggestions in his Next Avenue article, “A Charity Expert’s Advice on Giving Wisely.”

If happier stock market days are here to stay for a while, I can’t think of a better way to share the spoils.

 Kerry Hannon, Contributor

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